Good sex is something that we all want and need, but it’s something we don’t always know how to get.

Sometimes, when we talk about good sex, we’re referring to the orgasm — and we’ll often point out that not everyone has an orgasm every time they have sex. That’s true, but it’s not the whole story. An orgasm is lovely, but there’s a lot more to good sex than orgasms.

Good sex is more than just a physical act. It’s about controlling your body and emotions, feeling comfortable and connected with your partner, and expressing yourself.

What is good sex?

Good sex is about feeling connected with your partner and knowing you can be yourself around them — even if that means being vulnerable or needy. It’s about feeling safe enough to be yourself while knowing your partner will treat you well and support you through whatever happens.

Stimulating and gratifying sex is about timing, communication, and spontaneity. Communication is the key to a successful and healthy sexual life with your partner. If you don’t like a particular act, tell your partner.

If you want a particular act, tell him/her you like it and how you like it. Try to give your partner a confidence boost. Try always to complement their ways to pleasure you. Compliment them to boost their confidence level.

A lot of couples speak about foreplay. Foreplay is integral for a good sex session. It helps you get aroused, gets you in a mood and is all excited. You can indulge in foreplay for days long for that extra tinge of the hot atmosphere.

Good sex can only happen when you maintain a lot of time with yourself. Knowing your body is essential. If you spend some time with your body, you can tell where your erogenous zones are and what makes you feel good. Masturbation is a healthy form of self-exploration and should be explored by everyone.

How do you have good sex?

Discussed below are some tips that will help you have good sex:

Step 1: Educate yourself about sexual health 

Many materials are available for a good sex life over online sites. You can take help from there to educate yourself about it. 

Some reliable online sites are the sexual health page of the CDC website and the sexual health page of the NHS web portal.  In addition, many books are written on how to have a good and pleasurable sexual experience.

If talking to your partner directly is problematic, you can underline the passages or online sites you particularly like and show them. But if you want good sex, then communication is the key.

Step 2: Give yourself time

With your growing age, your libido slows down. You can also improve your chances of success by trying out a quiet, comfortable, and interruption-free area for sex.

This also means that since ageing, your body will require adjusting along with that change. Your body will take more time to get aroused and reach an orgasm.

Spending a lot of time having sex and working on these physical changes and necessities in your lovemaking session is always great. This can also open up a new world for you and your partner.

Step 3: You need to learn to relax

This is a problem for each one of us. If one is tense, they cannot enjoy sex and will keep engaging the mind in thinking other stuff. Do not be tense. If you are uncomfortable, start with kissing and slowly move into other acts.

Talk to your partner so that they can make you feel comfortable having good intercourse. Relaxing is very important during a make-out. If you are not pleased and feel being pushed, say no and come out of it. Do not indulge yourself in acts where you think you are being forced or negative.

Step 4: The foreplay is the best part

Foreplay plays a vital role in sexual acts. It helps build intimacy with your partner and makes you feel good. Engaging in foreplay makes you feel connected with your partner at an emotional level and prepares you for intercourse.

It is essential to know more about foreplay, and this article gives more details about it.

Step 5: Touching & massage 

Touching and massage are important acts during sex. You can have an excellent sexual experience by touching and kissing.

You can ask your partner about all sorts of touching-related things, which manner he would like to be touched, and vice versa. This will help you learn how much pressure you like, from gentle to firm. Skin-to-skin contact builds intimacy and connections.

You must master how to touch and massage to gain the best from your partner. It is worth searching a few reliable online resources to learn how to do it. This article gives you an intro to this area. 

Step 6: Use lubricant

You must consider using a suitable lubricant if the female partner experiences vaginal dryness.  Menopause is one reason for vaginal dryness. Another reason is when she is not entirely prepared for intercourse.

If you try to penetrate without adequate lubrication, irritation of the vaginal walls occurs, which causes pain and an unpleasant sexual experience. This can easily be fixed with lubricating liquids and gels available on the market. Don’t let this small thing become a problem for your sexual relationship. 

Support your partner and converse with each other to not make this into a relationship tension.

Step 7: Try different positions

Developing a schedule for trying out new positions during sex can be an excellent idea. This adds interest to the lovemaking session and can help improve your sexual experience.

For example, certain positions are immensely pleasurable for a woman, and again, certain positions are equally satisfying for a man. Different sex positions are essential to maintain a healthy sexual relationship to break from monotony. Try these sex positions, and you can learn them from here. 

Step 8: Experiment with toys

Playing with sex toys gives you a remarkable sexual experience.  You can help your partner agree to a good playing session like vibrators and blindfolds.

Try to include regular props we use in our daily lives. Exploring the unknown can always enhance your sexual experiences. You can also try massaging each other to get into the mood.

The Bottom Line

Sex is all about experimenting. Do not be afraid to explore how to have a good and pleasurable sexual experience. Knowledge and all the resources will make your sexual experience pleasurable. In turn, it raises the level of your intimacy with your partner. 

The Secrets to Good Sex: Strategies for Deepening Connection and Pleasure